i love you.

don't know if anyone is gonna read this.
don't know if anyone in the world is ever gonna know about this..
i miss you, so much.
i miss you more than i've ever had.
i miss calling you 'sayang'
i miss hearing your voice
i miss seeing you, but i see you everywhere

my bed, when i woke up this morning, i remembered the time when you stayed over, or just when you last came into my room and lay on my bed. realizing it was the same bedsheet from the last time you came into my sanctuary.

and i lied on the floor just to change the atmosphere, but got reminded that even on that very same floor, memories of you have been etched so deeply there...

it freaking hurts. sitting by the table that i once sat with you right now.
using a laptop that has been touched by you.
walking that same path i used to walked hand in hand with you.
and i really want all of that.
i really want it all, right now.


walking past food places I once went with you..
sitting down on the bench, where we used to sit almost every single day..
standing at the mrt station where I used to stand with you.

can i have them all back? am I being selfish?

why do I have to trap myself in this maze?


can you ask me out again?

can you tell me you love me again?

can you tell me again that im the one, like how you used to say?

can we sit down on that bench near your hostel?


if you'd not chosen that school, maybe things would not have turned out this way, am i right?

if i'd made it on time on friday, and went to the embassy with you, would things probably not be like this?


if i love you, then i should let it go right?

but how  could i let go of the person i love so much..

how can i love someone without expressing it to them..?



._.

a dream is a wish your heart makes..yup.. i agree..